Monday, August 19, 2019

RAPID FIRE REVIEWS: August 19th, 2019


 MRMOVIESETC REVIEWS:

“Long Shot” (2019)


I’m not sure which part of this is stranger; the fact that Charlize Theron and Seth Rogen play off each other much better than expected, or that fact that Theron does well at all in this movie. Don’t get me wrong, Theron is an outstanding actress, and yes, I know she’s been in comedies before. Whether the directors in past efforts didn’t know what to do with her, or she for some reason is naturally awkward in those situations, her performances haven’t seemed to work very well when trying to be funny. Jonathan Levine seems to have recognized this about her and tailored her arc to fit that characteristic perfectly.

Sure, Rogen is still somewhat typecast as the goofball in Fred Flarsky, but not nearly as much this time around as Fred tries to take his professional life fairly seriously. Theron’s character of Charlotte Field isn’t exactly stuffy, although, being hyper-focused on bidding to be the first female President of the United States makes her enough of an opposite to Flarsky that they mesh rather irresistibly throughout.

Interestingly enough, this film takes enough of an adult drama approach that, at least for me, there weren’t any gut-busting laughs, per se, but still enough comedy that really worked to keep me in a good mood. Also, hey, it turns out you actually can make comedies silly and wholesome at the same time without dick and vagina jokes. How bold!

I will conclude with, while I appreciated them, there were some not-so-subtle jabs at Trump and FoxNews that were more eye-rolling than successful. It’s kind of one of those things where you can’t out-stupid the source material.

I’d say definitely give this one a shot, no pun intended. There are worse ways to spend an evening.

“Long Shot”: 8/10



“The Curse of La Llorona” (2019)


No.

Let me count to you the ways of NO:

The ghoul looks nothing other than the Nun had a costume change.

The acting was okay, but with writing this lazy, it doesn’t matter one iota.

The so called loop into the “Conjure-verse” was cheap and tacky to the degree that I feel as though anybody that paid for a theater ticket should get refunded for such a blatant bait-and-switch.

The only “scares” are jump scares, and you could see every single one of the coming. And they all suck.

Did I mention lazy? Given the source material that could have been taped in to, it makes this piece of shit even more of a shell.

Fine; that one scene with the kids in the car was kind of suspenseful. Almost as suspenseful as when it looks the vending machine isn’t going to give you what you paid for. Almost.


No.

Just. No.

“The Curse of La Llorona”: 2/10



“POKEMON Detective Pikachu” (2019)


To say I’ve been out of the Pokémon loop for a while, I am talking clear back to the GAMEBOY days of “Ruby” and “Sapphire”. After that, they started making Pokémon that were lampshades or something, and I decided I had reached the end of my Pokémon ride. In all honesty, I cannot even remember which GAMEBOY model those two versions came out on without looking it up. I want to say it was the flip one that had the first built in lighting for playing in the dark, but I could be really off.

Look, I know, I’m getting older! Damn it. It has gotten to the point that I don’t even remember the original “Detective Pikachu” that this film is supposed to be based on; should that help paint an impressively more depressing picture.

Anyway, since I have been away from the scene for a while, the first few looks of this film were interesting, but also beyond bizarre. This is definitely one of those scenarios where it was either going to go really right or really wrong, and considering the track record of video game film adaptations, can one really fault anybody for being pessimistic?

Luckily, and perhaps surprisingly, I had a great time with this one. I have no idea why or how Ryan Reynolds works as the token cutest Pokémon, but he does, and he is easily the heart and soul of this movie. Quickly hearkening back to what I was just saying about being older, there were some Pokémon that I didn’t recognize at all and dismissed as easily, but seeing old faces like Charizard, Bulbasaur, Meotwo, Ditto, and a host of others, took me back to my GAMEBOY happy place.

The plot, as these things go, is a little thin despite trying to have something deeper to say about different species living together in harmony regardless of our differences (super subtle), yet I was absorbed up enough in it that I completely missed the main twist that isn’t hard to spot when paying close enough attention.

The CGI is pretty decent too, and the pacing stays nice and crisp enough that the whole thing feels like a breeze by the time it’s over. Other than some general silliness here and there that doesn’t contribute much, this is likely one of the best video game films so far – keeping in mind how low the bar was to begin with.

“POKEMON Detective Pikachu”: 8/10



“Wine Country” (2019)


Eh, I’m not lying when I say this one let me down quite a bit.

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before, but “Wine Country” brings an ensemble cast of comedy veterans/friends together for an R-rated road trip story that is supposed to be a celebration of life as each are advancing into middle age, but instead all goes to shit because each brings some secret baggage along for the ride.

Truthfully, I am an easy lay when it comes to this, and the draw of Maya Rudolph and Amy Poehler (also directing) was all I needed to look forward to it. Sadly, the screenplay this time around is just not very good, and I mean that as in it’s a tease. Some scenes are an absolute riot; the most memorable one being the handing out of sex toys in a restaurant. That being said, the lulls in-between offer hardly a hint of flavor that I know all these actors are capable of killing without any effort. In fact, “Wine Country” is mostly the opposite – the jokes are entirely too forced and you can see it on the actors’ faces.  Having that happen once or twice is something that can be recovered from, but when it’s over and over and over again, I was out of it with a good twenty-ish minutes left to spare.

Poehler does show that she can be good behind the lens, and while the writing didn’t support this debut, I certainly hope she keeps going after it. Hollywood is in bad need for good comedy these days.

“Wine Country”: 4/10



“The Red Sea Diving Resort” (2019)


White saviors, white saviors, white saviors.

Ok, I got it out early just in case, because god forbid it doesn’t get mentioned.

Yes, there is no real way to spin this film away from the fact that very Caucasian men, and woman, helped save thousands of Jewish refugees from the Sudan. Yes, “Diving Resort” is an extremely loose telling of the actual events that took place, including the location. Nevertheless, I do have to exert some sarcastic retort to the lashings this film took early from mainstream critics, because a lot of Israelites are light-skinned and the real footage that played during the credits only proved that. Still, Chris Evans playing the hero in a story like this is kind of funny in an “eek, that’s severely Hollywood” way. But hey, he gets mostly nude a few times during the film, so small victories if you’re into that.

Putting all of that business aside, looking at “Diving Resort” strictly as it is, it’s a decently suspenseful thriller. It’s certainly not the best of its kind; in fact, the farther along it went, the more it morphed into the light beer version of “Argo”. The performances are good, and Gideon Raff can keep the tension up enough that I didn’t have any worries about seeing it through to the end and whether or not it would be worth it. That being said, there’s not much going on beneath the surface. The film presents itself exactly as it intends to be, and it never strays from that path.

Like I said, for all intents and purposes, it’s not bad. Surely there will be plenty that will want to tear it apart for its representation of various nationalities, and that’s their prerogative. As for me, I enjoyed it, but I’ll watch “Argo” instead from here on out.

“The Red Sea Diving Resort”: 7/10

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